You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
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