I want to make a zoo with you.
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
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