Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize
