Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
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