Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
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