Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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