dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Randomize
