I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize