Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
Randomize
