plz talk dirty to me
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
The air was thick with penises
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
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