i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
