god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
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