i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
I drunkenly recorded an episode of Family Matters last night. I took a shot everytime Carl Winslow had a mustache.
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
Randomize
