I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
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