More tranny stories later!
I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
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