Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
