I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
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