me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
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