I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
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