I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
This is the high leading the old right now
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
Randomize
