Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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