we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
If Curt Schilling could pitch a game with that blood-filled sock... if Tiger Woods won the 2008 US Open with a torn ligament, then I'd be an embarrassment to the human race if I couldn't manage to at least jerk him off even if I was still crying after he put it in my butt.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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