Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
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