what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
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