Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
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