Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
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