; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
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