It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
only if we run a train.
done.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
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I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
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