I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
I wear drunk well.
Randomize
