Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
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We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
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