shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
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