so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Randomize
