Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Randomize
