so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
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