you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
Randomize
