Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
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