hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
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He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
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Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
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