and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
I have aggressive nipples.
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
Randomize
