I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
Randomize