I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize
