So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
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