He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
Realized I'm still to drunk to comprehend work emails. Marked them all as unread. Here's to responsible hang overs.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
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