very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
you inspire me to be a worse person
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
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