We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
Randomize
