My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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