Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
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