a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Randomize