oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
Randomize
