Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
Randomize
