I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
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