Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
