dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
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