i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Another f*ing night of vodka youporn and xanax. I need to get a goddamn life
3 great things that go great together... But not on a Friday night. Perfect on say... a Tuesday.
I just accidentally handed the ticket lady a condom instead of the intended ticket. I am now the official whore of Harry Potter.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize
